steppingskyward

things happened over spring break and Les Miserables rehearsals are going to kill me i am not conditioned for playing music after 3 hours like that's my limit i can't function after that point (i usually get headaches and get really cranky and it's not fun for anyone involved)
also my drive to produce actual art as compared to doodles had been on its last leg for a while (then things happened and that uh...killed it.  just straight up killed it for a long, long time.  far longer than what was necessary).
however, it's coming back i just
haven't made anything really good, you know?
my confidence is kinda shot
i'm proud of nothing that i've made in the recent year (except some of my doodles, but those aren't really legitimate art pieces, and i don't want to weigh people down with a thousand sketch dumps. i can do better).
so for now i'll be at least a little bit active on my tumblr steppingskyward.tumblr.com/

and then if i can't surprise-post anything, i'll for sure be back in summertime to start some of my comics and stories, and hopefully you all will be able to expect a lot of personal and artistic growth from me

i'll see you then

WASSUP I'M BACK FROM SACRAMENTO AND I'M TRYING TO PRETEND I DON'T HAVE AN ESSAY TO WRITE

woooooooooooooooooow okay it's been a while since i've done one of these and it's singles awareness day to me thANK YOU
warning i'm probably just going to do what i normally do and make fun of the questions.  also again it's late because of SAC [which was awesome but i'm really tired okay we had like on average 8+ hours of legislating/debate a day for three days i'm exhausted]

tagged by Rainbow-Foxy
1. Are you single or taken?
whaddoyou think.
_{translation--single.  although it is hunting season and valentine's day and mAMA GOT A NICE BIG GUN WITH A BIG SCOPE AND THEN LIKE THAT LITTLE ZOOM THINGY AND I ALREADY HAVE MY PREY BAITED AND IN FRONT OF ME now it is only a matter of time.  big cat knows when to strike i've done it before it's okay i gOT THIS)}

2. Chocolate or flowers?
always choose chocolate there is NO chocolate in my house and i need it.

3. Will you do anything special for Valentines Day?
i went on a plane at seven in the morning to Sacramento and my delegation all had secret valentines and mack got me a stuffed alligator so...yes.

4. Do you LIKE like anyone?
for the first time in years, yes.  (guys i'm not even kidding about the years thing this is not normal occurrence to me my friends all freaked out.  the fact i even brought it up is astounding tbh i don't like sharing personal matters like this at all.)

5. Were you dating anyone last Valentines?
PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT

6. Who do you want to spend Valentines with?
PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT well no okay the group i had was nice and the alternate we're-too-poor-for-winter-formal thing i went to last time was fun.  that group would've been nice to see again, i liked them.

7. Do you make a big deal about Valentines?
no.  but i am sad i didn't get to pass out valentines to all my friends that had the "i'm crying but my dick's still hard" thing on them (favorite valentine phrase of all time okay)

8. Have you ever had a secret admirer?
yes and it made me very uncomfortable because it wasn't a secret.  to me.  i knew who sent it and _no
again i have a severe abhorrence for mushy and public displays of affection, ESPECIALLY when it's to me.  no.  please dear god no even if i DO like you do not EVER.

9. Would you ever write someone a love letter?
i already have and i'm not doing it again that shit was embarrassing

10. Do you believe in Cupid?

_{i'm not even giving you an answer to this}

11. Do your parents give you presents on Valentines?
um...i don't think so but HEY IF YOU WANT A CUTE STORY INVOLVING PARENTS MAKING UP FOR LACK OF SUITORS my dad got me a little wrist carnation for homecoming and it was really cute okay.

12. Do you still send out Valentine cards?
the sarcastic ones off tumblr, yes.  i love those.

13. Do you like candy hearts?
only if they're the ones where the writer treats valentines day how i do (meaning dripping with sarcasm and cynicism)

14. What is something you got last Valentines?
uh

15. Is Valentines depressing?
no.  i have relatively no feelings for it, nor anything love (in the real world).

16. How is your love life?
nope

17. Have you ever been dumped on Valentines?
dude i've never even had a date on valentines.  who the hell dumps people on valentine's day

18. How many roses would you want to receive?
can i have a lotus instead i love lotuses (like in a little thing of water that'd be cute huh)

19. Will Did you have a girlfriend/boyfriend this Valentines day?
nope

20. Do you look forward to Valentines day?
i do not care about valentine's day

21. Who was your last Valentine from?
Mack(enzie).  Secret valentine's for sacramento.  she got me lots of chocolate and a stuffed alligator and balloons and cups (which we later threw a little hotel party with it was awesome)

22. Who do did you expect to get a Valentine from this year?
someone in my delegation outside of Y&G/my MLC delegation, no one.  (well i guess if we'd had school i probably would've gotten funny/friendly valentines from people, which i really like actually.  i don't mind not getting actual in-the-spirit-of-love things)

23. Who would you most like to receive a Valentine from?
his name shall not be stated anywhere publicly online mostly for my own protection.  although i'd SINCERELY hope that it was a private thing.

24. How many Valentines will you be sending did you send this year?
i forgot and i was on a fieldtrip that day TECHNICALLY ONE FOR CHRISTINE!

25. Have you ever not received a Valentine?
no i think i've recieved them from friends every year.  i have good friends, they're good at remembering to do kind stuff for people.

26. What was the most Valentines you received in a single day?
no idea

27. Have you ever received an anonymous Valentine?
i don't think i have

28. Have you ever sent an anonymous Valentine?
_{we don't talk about this okay}

29. Will you be sending an anonymous Valentine this year?
i'm never sending an anonymous valentine EVER again thank you

30. What was the best Valentine gift you ever received?
the one Mack gave me

31. What was the worst?
no idea

32. Have you ever started dating someone on Valentines day?
PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT

okay so yes all you need to know about me and public love-involving relations is that i dislike them and i dislike having feelings for people but apPARENTLY you can't avoid that (fuck you too, hormones).  i don't care about this holiday and i don't let it get to me because i don't need it to...so uh...yeah.

but okay back to the anonymous valentine's thing, Bryan sent out like 5 anonymous telegrams to people that deserved to be punished.  He sent one from "Obama" to Merit and i wish i was in the class that sent them because oh my god bryan you are the greatest person

feel free to tag yourselves, guys.

but i'm probably gonna be on a longterm hiatus
because i'm not happy
about anything that i've drawn
(i've been drawing but you guys havne't seen it i'M SORRY I SWEAR TO GOD ONE DAY I'LL DO A REALLY REALLY BIG SKETCHDUMP AND I'LL MAKE IT REALLY NICE I JUST DON'T KNOW WHEN OKAY)

because see here's the thing
the Sacramento trip for Y&G California (GO LOOK IT UP ON GOOGLE IT'S AWESOME.  if you can participate in Y&G of any form around you i HIGHLY suggest)
which is going to be great but lunar new year in chinese class made me fall behind in like everything
and i'm gonna join in the school's pit orchestra for the musical starting in march
and festival season starts in march
and um
i don't know why but march is just really hectic every year

so i don't exactly know when i'm going to be back

BUT BUT HEY ALRIGHT LISTEN UP I HAVE SOME GOOD NEWS AS WELL
GO FOLLOW THE ART TUMBLR BECAUSE IT'S MY LESS-GOOD STUFF BUT IT'S STILL STUFF steppingskyward.tumblr.com/

AND!  I was watching a livestream/speech/recording of a professional artist, and they talked about drawing in the morning as compared to nighttime (i used to think i drew okay after school or at night but the more i think about it, the more i realize those are terrible times for me to draw).
So I'm going to start waking up around 4-4:30am every morning to draw (i have to actually get up around 5-5:30 thanks to first period)
so this should HOPEFULLY make me more productive
also my brain works surprisingly well around that time of ...morning.

so um

again
i've been dead i know
but i AM coming back in the summer/after march.
and i will post.
and you should all expect great things from me ... mostly because the pressure will force me to do better.

anyway, that's all.
thanks guys
i will see you

So as most of you know I'm in this thing called MLC and it's awesome and whatever except it's taking away all my study time that I was going to use for procrastination and internet.
So um.
Also our finals are going to be this week, so I SHOULD have time to maybe do something with my life (you can also follow the art tumblr: steppingskyward.tumblr.com/ )
but after that I am really going to be gone because February and March are going to be batshit craycray for me due to Chinese Club trying to make fucking MIRACLES happen for the Lunar New Year, MLC (our big trip to Sacramento is right on Valentine's Day) and then festival season starts for orchestra.  And I might do the Les Miserables play at our school I dunno man I want to but...god I hAVE ENOUGH GOING RIGHT NOW THANKS.

BUT!
Start looking forward to Pokeventure because that is
1-going to happen
2-going to happen very SOON
3-I've started actually doing concept art and I'm gonna be laying out a storyboard soon so HOPEFULLY this summer I'll get my butt on that.

LOOK FORWARD TO GREAT THINGS, MY FRIENDS.

I bless u.
see you later.

and I mean REALLY dead recently.
Although, should note, if you would like to contact me, i check my regular tumblr all the time dio-incarnate.tumblr.com/


ALSO!  I GOT MYSELF AN ART TUMBLR!  steppingskyward.tumblr.com/
go check it out, i SWEAR i will be posting more somewhere.
Truth be told though I'm just...worn out, and I haven't been happy with anything, and I've started to become extremely self-conscious with what i post anywhere online.  But I'm getting better...I think.
Someone came and talked to me the other day, very concerned that I'd become so inactive on here.  Sorry about that, will fix soon enough.

I don't even know what to contribute it to, it's not that the school year it's hard it's just...I think I've gotten a little addicted to the online stuff.  And I'm working on stopping that.
Anyway.
I'M NOT DEAD YET.
I HAVEN'T FORGOTTEN YOU.
I haven't forgotten my promises, no siree.  I'm still here and I will deliver.

Anyway, happy new year!